Dave and Alonso somehow segue from the food-porn of TOAST to the stomach-turning new HUMAN CENTIPEDE movie. Also: Why the current crop of Christian movies are like the gay films of the mid-to-late 1990s.

Dave and Alonso saw a whole bunch of movies separately this week, so they compare notes on the new releases. And then they talk a lot about Rex Reed who, it turns out, turned 73 on the very day we taped this. So Happy Birthday, Rex!

In what may be a show record, there are three new movies that Dave and Alonso really love. The other three, not so much.

Dave and Alonso discuss violent men, whiny women, and irritating teenagers. And Snoopy.

The scalping of Gwyneth Paltrow must be discussed, but first, Dave and Alonso have reminiscences about working in movie theaters during the summer of 1984. The ugly truth about nacho cheese and grape soda is frankly revealed.

It's Labor Day Weekend, and the movies kinda suck. Dave and Alonso would rather talk about Thundercats and beer pong and "American Idol" runners-up and the Spin Doctors and decapods.

Guest critics Jen Yamato and Todd Gilchrist join Alonso to discuss more late-summer movies. There's also confessions about classic movies not seen and mockery of junket journos who call celebs by their first names. Follow our guests at Twitter: @jenyamato and @mtgilchrist

Dave and Alonso would rather talk about one-hit wonders and "Hart to Hart" than these late-summer doldrum movies, but they manage to cover both. Oh, and if you're a GetGlue.com person, you can now check in to the show -- but you'll have to find it listed with the TV shows. It just is.

Dave and Alonso welcome special guest Louis Virtel (Movieline.com, "Verbal Vogueing") to discuss what we love and hate about singing teenagers and why Part Fives are the new awesome. (If only the "House Party" franchise had made it that far.) The bumps in the audio happened because we decided later it wasn't nice to out a fellow film critic for crying at "Marley & Me."

Dave and Alonso contemplate a Partridge Family/Planet of the Apes cross-over and remember the R-rated movies of their childhood. P.S. We keep forgetting to mention that you should watch Alonso on Current's "50 Documentaries to See Before You Die."